(a.k.a The Devil's Dictionary, New Millennia Edition)
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n. A person who realizes all politicians are childish.
n. A person who has stopped growing at both ends and is now growing in the middle.
If you are young and you drink a great deal it will spoil your health, slow your mind, make you fat – in other words, turn you into an adult.
— P.J. O'Rourke