(a.k.a The Devil's Dictionary, New Millennia Edition)

 
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beauty

Cynical Definitions

n. The power by which a woman charms a lover and terrifies a husband.

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Cynical Quotations

There's a difference between beauty and charm. A beautiful woman is one I notice. A charming woman is one who notices me.

— John Erskine

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Beauty is only a light switch away.

— Unknown

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Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.

— Unknown

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Beauty is only sin deep.

— Saki

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A soiled baby, with a neglected nose, cannot be conscientiously regarded as a thing of beauty.

— Mark Twain

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I think on-stage nudity is disgusting, shameful and damaging to all things American. But if I were 22 with a great body, it would be artistic, tasteful, patriotic and a progressive religious experience.

— Shelley Winters

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