(a.k.a The Devil's Dictionary, New Millennia Edition)

 
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duel

Cynical Definitions

n. A formal ceremony preceding the reconciliation of two enemies. Great skill is necessary for its satisfactory observance.

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Cynical Quotations

I thoroughly disapprove of duels. If a man should challenge me, I would take him kindly and forgivingly by the hand and lead him to a quiet place and kill him.

— Mark Twain

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One would have thought litigation superior to dueling for the purpose of settling disputes – provided that one had not met a lawyer.

— William Ferraiolo

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