(a.k.a The Devil's Dictionary, New Millennia Edition)

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Cynical Definitions

n. An officer of the law charged with duties of the utmost gravity, and held in disesteem by a populace having a criminal ancestry.

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Cynical Quotations

In some of the American States his functions are now performed by an electrician, as in New Jersey, where executions by electricity have recently been ordered – the first instance known to this lexicographer of anybody questioning the expediency of hanging Jerseymen.

— Ambrose Bierce

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