(a.k.a The Devil's Dictionary, New Millennia Edition)

 
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experience

Cynical Definitions

n. What enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.

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n. Wisdom that enables us to recognize an undesirable old folly that we have already embraced and warmly remember.

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Cynical Quotations

Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so.

— Douglas Adams

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Experience is what allows us to repeat our mistakes, only with more finesse!

— Derwood Fincher

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You should make a point of trying every experience once, excepting incest and folk dancing.

— Sir Arnold Bax

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Experience is the name everyone gives to their mistakes.

— Oscar Wilde

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Good judgment comes from experience. Experience comes from bad judgment.

— Unknown

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Experience is the worst teacher; it gives the test before presenting the lesson.

— Vernon Law

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We spend the first half of our lives gathering experiences that we repeat endlessly in the second half.

— Guy Smith

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