(a.k.a The Devil's Dictionary, New Millennia Edition)

 
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jury

Cynical Definitions

n. Twelve people chosen to decide who has the better lawyer.

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Cynical Quotations

We have a criminal jury system which is superior to any in the world; and its efficiency is only marred by the difficulty of finding twelve men every day who don't know anything and can't read.

— Mark twain

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When you go into court you are putting your fate into the hands of twelve people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty.

— Norm Crosby

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The penalty for laughing in a courtroom is six months in jail; if it were not for this penalty, the jury would never hear the evidence.

— H.L. Mencken

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