(a.k.a The Devil's Dictionary, New Millennia Edition)

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Cynical Definitions

n. A system of voluntary taxation that extracts government revenue from the working poor whom otherwise are exempt, and the middle class whom are immune from understanding how thoroughly taxed they already are.

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Cynical Quotations

I've done the calculation and your chances of winning the lottery are identical whether you play or not.

— Fran Lebowitz

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How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'?

— Jay Leno

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There are few things in this world more reassuring that an unhappy lottery winner.

— Tony Parsons

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