(a.k.a The Devil's Dictionary, New Millennia Edition)

 
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maiden

Cynical Definitions

n. A young person of the unfair sex addicted to clueless conduct and views that madden to crime.

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Cynical Quotations

The genus maiden has a wide geographical distribution, being found wherever sought and deplored wherever found. The maiden is not altogether unpleasing to the eye, nor (without her piano and her views) insupportable to the ear, though in respect to comeliness distinctly inferior to the rainbow, and, with regard to the part of her that is audible, bleating out of the field by the canary – which, also, is more portable.

— Ambrose Bierce

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