(a.k.a The Devil's Dictionary, New Millennia Edition)

 
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men

Cynical Quotations

All men are animals; some just make better pets.

— Bumper Sticker

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A woman can fake an orgasm, but it takes a man to fake an entire relationship.

— Unknown

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I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.

— Rita Rudner

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The only thing worse than a man you can't control is a man you can.

— Margo Kaufman

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Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There's too much fraternizing with the enemy.

— Henry Kissinger

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The worst thing about some men is that when they are not drunk they are sober.

— William Butler Yeats

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Boys will be boys, and so will a lot of middle-aged men.

— Kin Hubbard

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Man is living proof that God has a sense humor – he gave him two heads and only enough blood to think with one at a time.

— Robin Williams

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All men are created unequal.

— Robert Heinlein

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Men are more sentimental than women. It blurs their thinking.

— Robert Heinlein

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The male is a domestic animal which, if treated with firmness, can be trained to do most things.

— Jilly Cooper

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