(a.k.a The Devil's Dictionary, New Millennia Edition)

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Cynical Definitions

n. Decisions people cling to because they dedicated a significant amount of time in making them (see marriage).

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Cynical Quotations

A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history – with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila.

— Mitch Ratcliffe

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A lifetime is more than sufficiently long to make every conceivable mistake. A weekend bender is almost enough by itself.

— Unknown

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You must learn from the mistakes of others. You can't possibly live long enough to make them all yourself.

— Sam Levenson

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