(a.k.a The Devil's Dictionary, New Millennia Edition)

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Cynical Definitions

n. A slimy, gobby shellfish which "civilization" gives men the fortitude to eat without first removing its entrails!

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Cynical Quotations

Some people purport that oysters are aphrodisiacs. Nonsense. This is a ruse by men to make certain sexual favors more palatable to women by the virtue of comparison.

— Guy Smith

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