(a.k.a The Devil's Dictionary, New Millennia Edition)

 
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painting

Cynical Definitions

n. The process of protecting flat, canvas surfaces from the weather and exposing them to the critic.

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Cynical Quotations

Rembrandt painted 700 pictures. Of these, 3,000 are still in existence.

— Wilhelm Bode

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Formerly, painting and sculpture were combined in the same work: the ancients painted their statues. The only present alliance between the two arts is that the modern painter chisels his patrons.

— Ambrose Bierce

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