(a.k.a The Devil's Dictionary, New Millennia Edition)

 
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telephone

Cynical Definitions

n. A device for extending miscommunications great distances. The absence of face-to-face interaction amplifies the effects.

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n. An invention whose chief purpose is to make a disagreeable person keep his distance.

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Cynical Quotations

The Americans have need of the telephone, but we do not. We have plenty of messenger boys.

— Sir William Preece, chief engineer of the British Post Office, 1876

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